To the Brink…

When I first knew I was going to be a father, I remember thinking of all the fun I would have with my kid. I remember thinking about all the bedtime stories and goodnight kisses and the make believe play I could have with her. There were mostly happy families depicted in tv and movies. I believed that having a family would be just as fun and… well perfect. I wasn’t prepared for what truly being a parent was all about. And it couldn’t be more different.

Don’t get me wrong, we have our share of “precious moments” like today when Maya started walking, yes walking. Not just one step and a stumble, it was a couple full steps. Awesome day! But in between all these great milestones and cherished moments are what I like to call “why me” moments. The times when your kid gives you attitude when you tell them they can’t have something, or when your kid refuses to do her homework or go to bed. These are the times that take all of your will power to keep from spanking them into submission. These are the moments that challenge your patience and test your mettle.

So what to do when your child just doesn’t want to do what you ask? I’ve threatened to take toys away, then actually take the toys away. That mostly works, but Bella has gotten to the point where she’s sad for a bit, then realizes that she has all this other stuff left to play with. So I’ve begun to lecture her, and that’s the one thing I told myself I’d never start doing. I go into why rules and chores are important, and that everyone in the family needs to pitch in and help. And respect for us as parents is required, and appreciated. I went on for the whole ride to school, and I forget half the things I said. It was an outer body experience, like my mom came into my body and took over. I could see Bella’s eyes glaze over and I thought, what is going on? I’ve turned into my mom!

I think this post was more of a venting post than anything. My children are beautiful bundles of joy that sometimes drive my to the brink… I wouldn’t have it any other way.

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